A (tongue-in-cheek) Ode to the Office Barnacles


You who cluster outside City Centre like flies approaching fresh poop.   You sicken me with your cloudy emissions! 

You will not be ignored!  You smoke so I must inhale your smoke too as I approach the hazy doors.  Damn you!  Damn your habit. 

I see you also drinking Tim Hortons coffee but do you share that delicious nectar?  Ever offer me a sip from the familiar brown cup?  Nay! 

But upon me you force your burning tobacco.  Your selfishness/generosity upsets me.

There is no escape.  As long as I have a mortgage I must work, and where I work, you apparently must be.  

Karma lives.  I used to smoke and inflict my pain on others.  Now you are getting revenge on behalf of the universe.  Have mercy on me!