Sports Mushbrain

I watch a lot of football.  Well, I multi-task by pecking on the laptop or filing my nails, but I usually pay attention to the game.

But I have some sort of defect in my grey matter that comes to light only during NFL games because I cannot for the life of me remember which quarterback goes with which team unless I’m watching them play.  There is one exception: Peyton Manning who’s with the Indianapolis Colts.  I saw him scene-steal as a guest host of Saturday Night Live a few years ago before I had ever paid much attention to his day job.  I recognize the other guys on sight:  Mark Sanchez, Ben Roethlisberger, Drew Brees, Tom Brady.  I like to do my own colour commentary.  “That Tony Romo.  Broke Jessica Simpson’s heart!” But away from the TV and on a non-game-day, I couldn’t match the QB to his team to save my life.

This must be a part of evolution.  Why would I, as the pelt-tanning, mammoth-cooking woman in the cave, need to know that Grog is the fastest runner during the hunt?  I wouldn’t.  But I’d develop the knowledge that sabre-toothed tiger skin makes the best rainwear and that elk hoofs, buffed to a high sheen, look appealing when hung in threes on the cave wall.  This is the only explanation I can come up with although it doesn’t explain why many, many women are able to recall the details that I cannot.  Different speeds of evolutions I suppose.  Mine must be stuck in first gear!

3 thoughts on “Sports Mushbrain”

  1. I’m sure there’s a chromosonal answer to your question. Just as words like “router”, “tungsten” or “vernier caliper” dissolve into “wah wah wah” when they enter your hearing gear, our species goes blank when confronted by “shoe rack”, “trivets” or “faux silk pleated cushion covers”.

    Viva la difference! Just don’t ask me to sit through “Two Poofs with Swatches” any time soon!

  2. All gender biases aside, I still can’t get over the fact that you would mock an amazing name like `Smoke and Bones’! I’m coming to visit just because of that restaurant!!

Comments are closed.