No More Trouble

Why we’re only now hearing that billionaire hotel magnate Leona Helmsley’s pampered pooch, Trouble, died in December, is a bit of a mystery.  Back when the Queen of Mean died in 2007, $12 million of her vast fortune was set aside for the care of Trouble, her beloved Maltese.

Trouble was 12 at the time of Leona’s demise and the howls of her decendents sent the matter of the dog’s trust fund to court where a judge reduced it to a mere $2 million.  The rest went to her otherwise omitted grandchildren.  Although she had to go on without her famous mistress, Trouble had a pretty sweet life.  Her caretaker spent $100 thousand a year on bodyguards alone, because Trouble was the target of kidnapping threats.  When Leona was alive, Trouble was hand-fed crab-cakes and chicken. Leona had demanded that everyone call the dog Princess but that ceased after her death, along with the hand-feedings.  Trouble had to make do with canned dog food.

Like many wealthy, elderly Americans, Trouble lived out her days in Florida, at a Helmsley Hotel.  Having stayed in the Helmsley in Manhattan, I’m confident in saying that Trouble’s surroundings were posh and comfortable.  Too bad about the crab cakes but the change in diet probably extended her life.

Meanwhile in New York City they’re having a dog fight of another kind.  A major pet cemetary has accepted the ashes of humans for burial alongside their fur babies for years, for a fee.  Now the city is putting a stop to it and families are howling mad.  Some have already paid for their post-cremation plots alongside their pets, had headstones engraved and expectations of where they would end up.  But the city says pets are pets and people are people and the two should not meet even as ashes in the soil.  Legal eagles had at one time determined that ashes are “no longer human” and therefore acceptable in a pet burial ground.  But that’s not even the issue.  It’s all about business.  Cemeteries for people have to operate as non-profit there, and pet cemeteries are for-profit businesses.  Seems to me that if someone can will a few million to their dog, certainly they can choose to spend a couple of thousand if they want to be next to them for eternity.

2 thoughts on “No More Trouble”

  1. Leona, by all accounts I’ve read, was a nasty old bitch. It’s only fitting that she go out with one of the most obscene gestures imaginable: leaving $12 million to her little flea-bag! What did the dog leave the remaining the money to? Congress?

  2. I find this article timely, given that I’ve recently been giving thought as to the disposition of my furry friend in the event of my passing. I won’t be leaving a trust fund with millions for their care, however I have been exploring who might be interested in taking my furry friend and will be providing specific details in my Will as to who to contact and where they should go. They’ve provided a valuable service to me over the years, and the least I can do is arrange a good home for their retirement

    The things we do for our furry friends..

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