I’ve heard that there are unevolved human beans out there who think, oh, it’s just the cat. They don’t appreciate our sensitive nature or the deep, inner conflict we feel about too much togetherness. Well, look out people because I’m having a moment that’s approaching a cat-astrophe! If I don’t get some alone time soon, I’m going to lose my trademark composure. If I could hold a pen, I’d write a strongly worded letter to the authorities and ask them to please go somewhere, anywhere, for just a while. I love them – I really do – but if I had claws, I’d climb the walls.
No matter where I go, they’re there. Morning, noon, mid-afternoon, dusk, midnight – it doesn’t matter. They’re always there! It’s as predictable as it is annoying. It seems I barely settle into my favourite bedspread under a beloved sunbeam and someone comes along and wants to discuss my beauty or to ask me if I’m having a good nap. How, dear fur-parent, can I possibly answer in the affirmative when merely posing the question brings the nap to an abrupt end?
Sure, go ahead and pick me up. No, no, don’t worry about whether I had any plans. Why I’m just tickled to be subjected to your whims! Let’s walk around like this for a long while, okay? I LOVE It. Really, I do.
And please, lock me in the litter-box room with you. It’s simply the best! I’ve gotten used to sharing the room for my most private moments. But you’ve closed me in and even worse, closed me out on more than one occasion. It appears you haven’t noticed that I’m not able to cross my legs.
It feels like someone is always breathing down my neck. This feeling is especially strong when Mother or Father leans over me and actually breathes down my neck. I don’t want to hurt the feelings of those who love me most and open my food cans, but a girl really needs some solo space.
From what I’m overhearing in animated conversations with the black rectangle, we might be staying in close quarters for some time to come. I love my people, truly I do, but some days they get on my last nerve. Is it so wrong to want a few uninterrupted hours alone with Mr. Sunbeam?
Perhaps, my little yarn chasers, you offer a course in knitting by correspondence or need a couple more members for your online kazoo orchestra. I know two people who have time to spare! Recruit them, please. I’ll offer my highest recommendations and character references. They’re good human beans, they truly are, but too much togetherness doesn’t make this little heart grow fonder.
I do hope to connect to my happy place again, soon. To delight in the approach of my precious family instead of dreading what comes next. I did sense some hope. They both ventured outside for an extended period on a recent sunny day. I heard the brief rumble of Father’s motorcycle and later, the buzz of his chainsaw. Better days are coming, my friends. They’re coming soon.
With love and a wish for your continued good health,