Miss Sugar Writes: Cat Beautiful, Coyote Ugly

night timei picture of a coyote snipped from the video embedded in the story

Hello my little whisker twitchers! I trust you had a safe and spooky Halloween and you’re working your way through the leftover candy you stashed before the kiddies arrived! That’s how it plays out around here, anyway. Father insisted that peanut butter cups must be part of our offerings. Come Halloween, like magic, there were no cups to be found!

You might be aware of my ambivalence regarding the canine species. I’ve been rough on them and I’ve apologized. Dogs are, undoubtedly, the most loyal of home-guarders one could find. I mean, really, would you expect the family gold fish to stop a break-in? No, it’s the dog that secures the castle best.

I also have a well-documented bias about outdoor cats. We are a domestic species and though we might gaze longingly into the unknown, it’s too dangerous for us to experience it first-hand. Once we’re inside, we ought to stay safe and warm there. Personally, I’m waiting for Santa to bring me a tiny virtual-reality headset. Only then will I traverse the wilds of the outdoors and feel secure in doing so.

But even I have to admit when an anomaly occurs and is worth sharing. Imagine, a common housecat, allowed outdoors, that’s as brave as any dog you’ve met! I know, dear souls, it’s hard to fathom, what with the time-worn cliché of “scaredy cat” still being bandied about.

But here’s proof! Watch how fast Sunny, of the Koeller family in Phoenix, rids the yard of a coyote!

Isn’t he something? That coyote looks powerfully hungry but he couldn’t stand up to the outrage, the anger, the sheer incredulity of Sunny! How dare Wile E. attempt to violate the sanctity of Sunny’s home! Who knows what the barking creature’s motive was? To take Sunny’s treats? Curl up on the couch with the Koellers as they watch Netflix? Has he no shame?

As it happens, last week the human bean Bill next door witnessed two coyotes running at full speed between our respective houses. Beans have encroached on their habitat. It’s unfortunate. But it made me wonder: was there a cat behind them, chasing them away from our neighbourhood? Now I think it’s possible!

Friends, I will never recommend employing a cat as a guard for your home or business. But this security footage is proof that cats are capable of such a job! It turns out that Sunny is five years old and street smart. This gorgeous animal used to be homeless. So, he knows how to take care of himself and survive without humans and their beautiful opposable thumbs and can openers. Again, I must point out, that if we have to survive on our own, we can. But we’d rather be with you.

Do you think Sunny would be interested in an older woman? I think I’m in love!

Please be kind to each other. And remember, it takes a dozen fun-size chocolate bars to equal one full-size one. At least, that’s what they say around here.

Have a wonderful weekend my little mewlers!

Your friend,

Miss Sugar

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