Clicking for Work

close-up of a computer keyboard

When I don’t have a writing or voicing job on the go, and I’m not helping Derek by editing an audiobook, I troll the Internet for freelance work.

It’s targeted trolling, to websites where I already have a profile such as some of the freelancer sites I wrote about in THIS POST  a couple of years ago. My profiles are clear; they include my abilities, preferred types of jobs and how much or little I’m willing to work for. I thought you might enjoy some of the amusing job postings brought to me by internal algorithms at these sites.

Voice-job posting matches me at 60% to the job description which is "hopeful Tennessee African-American Female".

The percentage at the far right indicates how closely I match the job description. This would draw one to conclude that I’m 60% “hopeful Tennessee African American Female”, to which I respond, I think I’m closer to 0%!

I’ve been a 40% match to “native Punjabi speaker” and “Chinese”. None of these attributes appears in my profile or abilities, I assure you!

But the best ones have to be the requests for a ghost-writer. People want writers for all sorts of projects, but this one is my absolute fave.

Post for a "ghost writer for blog content about marketing" includes the sentence: You will be responsible for coming up with the ideas and the writing."

If I’m coming up with “the ideas and the writing”, that’s not ghost-writing, that’s writing!

There are a lot of jobs posted by people who have no idea what they’re doing and want someone to think for them, for an entry-level pay rate. And I suppose there’s always someone who will do the work. It’s a jungle out there. I’ve also started auditioning to narrate audiobooks, like Derek does. And I got my first gig – a short, four-part non-fiction series. The ACX algorithm is bringing me a lot of steamy novels to audition for. I wouldn’t feel comfortable narrating them though, so I take a pass and wait for the ones I think I can do justice to.

The top voice coaches tell you to move on after an audition. Don’t look back to see whether they hired someone or, if the website allows it, gave a thumbs-up on your performance. But I’ve been following the progress of a job I did months ago for a major union. Finally, it showed up, but it’s not my voice on the video. They hired a man. Same script, same everything. To reset my priorities and salvage my ego Derek asked, “Did you get paid for it?” Why yes, I did, but it still doesn’t feel great to be replaced. However, if they had given the job to another woman, that would have been cause for alarm. They truly went in a different direction.

Between us, last week Derek and I completed voice jobs for clients in India, South Africa, Vietnam and here in Ontario. Going online to search for work isn’t perfect, as I’ve shown you, but it brings you the world and it’s a lot better than waiting for the world to come to you.

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