I love Father more than treats, my bacon toy or kibble. Perhaps you know the history, perhaps you don’t. Mother adopted me on her birthday a few years ago. She waited for me to get well because when we met, I was wearing an ugly cone and experiencing some gastric distress. When I finally came home with her and laid eyes on Father, I knew I’d found my protector and BFF for life. Mother says tiny hearts flew up like sparks between us. But I have to confess that I’ve developed a crush on another man.
Yes, Mr. Steve Harvey. Father and I have taken to watching him host Family Feud many evenings. We celebrate when the winning family plays Fast Money and gets $20-grand. But mostly, I think about nestling beside him on his expensive couch and feeling his meaty hand resting gently on my coat. Have I said too much?
It’s possible that I have cabin fever that has rendered me delirious, but I do believe this crush is based on real feelings. When Steve reacts to a dumb answer with a blank look and the studio audience roars, I feel proud.
The other night, Steve asked a contestant: “What is a bad habit that could ruin a woman’s looks?”
The guy responded: “Big nose!”
The stunned look on Steve’s face made my tail twitch!
This development doesn’t mean I love Father any less. I believe that Steve is merely a fantasy to fill a mind that is used to being busier. Mother is feeling it too. Not the crush (although I can’t be sure!) but the need to do more. She washed the furniture covers, my collapsed bed and various other things that really seemed like cleanliness overkill. I’d help her but I can’t reach the knobs on the washer. Plus, I don’t want to encourage her to remove my special scent from my favourite things.
Like our time in Wallaceburg and our stay in this apartment, this too shall pass. Until then, I have Father and Steve to keep me company, if only in my dreams.
Remember: adopt don’t shop!
Your fur-ever friend,
Miss Sugar
PS. If you have an Amazon Echo or Google Home, you can enable Miss Sugar’s Diary by clicking here. Thank you, pumpkin!